ABOUT STEVE

Embodied Counseling, Sexological Bodywork & Somatic Sex Education

Steve sees clients in Los Angeles and remotely via video & phone sessions

What would it be like if we could befriend our “wounds” and see them 

as our greatest access to the growth we so desire? And…would it be so bad if the process was pleasurable? 

Better yet, what if we had some great laughs at ourselves in the process for spending so much effort trying to fix something that was never really broken?”

For over 30 years Steve has been guiding clients to explore how they hold their life story in their bodies. Initially, his focus was working with people recovering from accidents, injuries and clients wishing to address specific health, wellness, and fitness goals. 

Very early in his work Steve became fascinated by the deeper issues we hold in our bodies, particularly when the techniques & tools of manual therapy didn't resolve things as expected. It’s then, by exploring our life experiences, and even emotional trauma, we can discover that the source of our issues may be in our history.

“This has been the most interesting part of my work. Exploring somatic/emotional connections and uncovering some deeper thing. Perhaps some old story or belief about ourselves that no longer serves us. And, like I’ve discovered with hundreds, maybe thousands of clients, it’s the areas where we have the most shame that we have the least growth and freedom. And, we hold that shame as contraction in our bodies. Old wounds, tucked away somewhere, hidden so we don’t have to confront things that seem unchangeable or even scary to reveal.”

Steve participated in his first personal growth experience in his teen years and then in the early 90's was trained as a Coach & Somatic Therapist. Later, when seeking to explore his next area of growth, he was trained and certified as a Sex & Relationships Coach in 2015, and then a Certified Somatic Sex Educator & Sexological Bodyworker in 2018.

“I came to this work in my 40’s after a lifetime of being painfully shy. After nearly half a lifetime of personal growth experiences something still alluded me...the freedom to express desire. I asked myself where did I have the least growth and freedom? Where did I have shame that was limiting me? Quite clearly it was the area of sex and intimacy. And, as I began to explore everything that stopped me from being free to explore and enjoy my experience of pleasure and eroticism, I realized that everyone else around me (who I assumed were enjoying wild and exotic sex lives - even those who I thought were real 'players') experiences the same kind of vulnerability, limiting beliefs and shame that left me unfulfilled and afraid of the risks that come with intimacy. Imagine that! We’re more alike than we could have ever thought.”

With Somatic Work we let the body lead. We seek to discover the innate wisdom within. Although clients come to address what they consider very real and oftentimes painful problems, Sexological Bodywork & Somatic Sex Education sets aside the problem / solution model so that we can engage with curiosity. This allows us to become the source of our own learning. Ultimately, we discover, that we are the source of our own growth, healing, and well-being as well.

“Our wounds are not bigger than us. We formed most of them in our childhood and have either been hiding from them or trying to fix them ever since. To do deep work we have to be armed with wonder, a willingness to learn, and above all, a great sense of humor”

Steve works with individuals, couples, groups, and people of all gender expressions & sexual orientations. He brings play, compassion, and an ability to normalize the shame and embarrassment that we hold in our bodies. Clients come to address a wide range of learning objectives & sexual wellness goals including:

◦ Physical issues that makes sexual connections difficult or painful, 

◦ Relief from all types of pelvic pain,

◦ Erectile & arousal issues, difficulty / inability to orgasm, difficulties with ejaculation control and/or overstimulation,

◦ Partner connection and intimacy,

◦ Learning to give/receive pleasure,

◦ Recovering sexual pleasure after childbirth; genital, pelvic or breast surgery; trauma,

◦ Accepting and loving one’s body, gender and sexuality,

◦ Exploring sexual themes and values.

◦ Male Sexuality

◦ LGBTQ+ Sexuality

Essentially, people bring specific challenges that they're aware of for which they're seeking understanding, acceptance, and relief. The bottom line is, we want to know we’re normal. Once we know this, and when we feel safe, we can begin to explore. On the other end of the spectrum, there are clients who already have fulfilling erotic connections and experiences and simply want to expand their capacity to experience pleasure.

But it's not just about sex!

Embodied work is not only focused on sexuality. In addition to expanding one's capacity to feel and heal erotically, sessions may also focus on:

◦ Boundaries & consent in non-sexual interpersonal relationships or partnerships, family, and even professional relationships,

◦ Grief & Loss

◦ Transforming one’s relationship to habitual behaviors, behaviors one considers addictive, or things one feels interferes with creating healthy relationships,

◦ Resolving conflict,

◦ Formative decisions that limit ones experience,

◦ Patterns of relating formed in early childhood relationships,

◦ Personal and/or professional goals where we feel challenged or stuck.

Basically, Somatic work is about teaching people how to come alive in their own bodies and be more connected to themselves and others. Sessions are guided by the client and are about awakening within them a sense of wonder. My goal is to support them in exploring what they want. Not what I think they want or think they should want, and not suggesting the “right” direction we should go. As a practitioner this is challenging. You have to set aside all of your great ideas and simply ask questions that direct people back to themselves. I serve as an advocate for their desires which, in many cases, they've forgotten exist because they’re hidden under shame and ideals about what sex and eroticism should and shouldn’t be. Beginning this exploration has to be playful, open, and safe.

“The pioneers in the field of embodiment, sexuality, eroticism and consent are real champions of self-expression, something to which I’m grateful to lend my voice and passion. The work is both liberating and healing...and the healing that clients experience is a return to the self. A homecoming of sorts. And, as with all homecomings, we all get to celebrate. When one of us heals, we all heal.”