About Dr. Ori 

Somatic, Attachment based Clinical Sexologist, Dr. Ori Nelsen (pronouns: they/them/she /her), is certified in Sex Therapy through (CIIS) California Institute of Integral Studies. They are also trained in various somatic and attachment-based modalities.

I am passionate about healthy, loving, equitable, secure-functioning relationships. My professional and personal interests include attachment dynamics & relationship issues, nonviolent communication skills, intimacy, sexuality, parent-child attachment, perinatal psychology, pregnancy issues & positive parenting, transpersonal psychology and holistic wellbeing.

I am most interested in helping people to cultivate loving intimate relationships, whether that relationship is to one’s own self or with others. Intimacy and love begin with ourselves and then extends into our connections with others. To have compassion for others, first requires to have self-compassion. I also love helping people step into an empowered place in their sexuality.

I wrote my doctoral dissertation on sexuality, attachment bonding in intimate relationships and the impact of trauma. I understand the complexity of attachment dynamics and strive to help facilitate the healing process. Secure attachment leads to emotional closeness and safety, which is crucial for intimate healthy partnering.

I believe we all have the capacity to generate self-awareness and have an innate ability to heal our pain. Assisting partnerships and individuals foster deeper compassion, healthy attachment and intimacy in their relationships is what this work is about.

I also know that sexuality is a normal part of human experience and have witnessed so much pain and confusion around the topic. I operate from a shame-free, sex positive social-impact lens. I believe Pleasure is a Human right. Sexuality is as unique as a fingerprint; people can learn how to become fluent in their sexual languages, while learning how to speak that of their partner(s).

Sexuality needs to be explored and healed within the context of attachment, trauma and social justice. I support and understand the nuanced dynamics of intimate connection, attachment wounds, complex trauma, diverse relationship styles (such as ENM / Polyamory; LGBTQ+, BDSM/Kink etc) and multicultural issues.

I work collaboratively, relationally and with a sense of reverence as witness and guide, while holding space for humor and transformation.

-Dr. Ori Nelsen

Dr. Ori SPECIALIZES IN:

• Healthy Sexuality and Sexual Functioning for LGBTQIA+ Folks

• Attachment-Based Partnership & Sexuality Support

• Attachment-Based Individual Sexuality & Intimacy Support

• Desire discrepancies between partners

• Asexuality

• Non-Binary And Trans Sexuality

• Demi-sexuality

• Cultivating Sexual Intelligence

• Exploring Kink

• Self-Esteem around Sex and Communicating Needs

• Identifying, Releasing and Healing Sexual Shame

• Cultivating Secure-Functioning & Attachment

• Somatic-Based Sexuality

• Healing Trauma in Sex, Gender and Sexuality

• Personal Growth within the Realms of Sexuality

• General Sexuality and Intimacy Issues

• Issues around Sexual Abuse & Sexual Trauma (not through psychotherapy)

• Trans, Femme, LGBTQIA+ and Pansexual Sexuality and Intimacy Needs

• Polyamory, Ethical Non Monogamy, and Open Relationship Issues & supporting secure-attachment & Intimacy within these relationship configurations

• Cultivating Secure Attachment & Functioning in Monogamous and Non-Monogamous Partnerships

• Kink, BDSM, and LGBTQAI+ Relationship Needs

• Integration of Experiences around Spiritual and Sexual Explorations

• Beginning Exploration of Personal Sexuality:

  • How to talk with a parter about sex and desires

  • Identify your own desires, boundaries and needs.

• Learning to improve self-esteem and bodily awareness

• Understanding blocks to self pleasure and how to move through them

• Self-Love and Embodied Sexuality

• How to create a space of Radically Intimate Sex with Self and Others

• Heal from body and gender dysphoria through empowered and embodied sexuality

• Cultivate awareness, vocabulary and expression of one’s sexual, emotional and relationship needs and boundaries

• How to Discuss and Practice Safer Sex (Emotionally and Physically) and Intimacy

• Developing and Deepening Emotional and Sexual Intelligence

• Turning up the SPARK and FIRE in your own sexuality and with Partner(s).

• Collaborative Goals for your own Embodied and Empowered Sexuality

• Having more access to your pleasure.

• Get in touch with your playful and creative aspects of your sexuality

• Break negative patterns in your relationships

• Improve communication and intimacy.

• Holding space for you to explore, while gently supporting you in identifying and meeting your goals.

• Developing the freedom to express your authentic self

• Recognizing barriers to romantic and or sexual connection & love and removing them

• Finding your voice and becoming freer to speak your mind and desires

• Connecting and/or reconnecting to your sexual and / or creative self

• Building sexual self-esteem

• Feeling less isolated and building community

• Learning how to have a voice in sex and removing psychological blocks, such as goals around talking about sex, talking “dirty” (or hot), setting boundaries, & exploring and owning your own fantasies and needs (this is accomplished by working on the blocks and goals and then assigning exercises for you to do on your own or with a partner).

Dr. Nelsen has a Doctorate and a Masters degree in Clinical Psychology with an emphasis on attachment and relationship dynamics. They also have a Bachelors degree in Human Sexuality & Psychology and a BFA in Studio Arts. They are a published author in the field of gender and sexuality. They have presented their research at national conferences. Excerpts of their research work have been used in a university course entitled "Women's Gender and Sexuality Studies: Race, Sex, Gender and the Body" at Cal State Long Beach. Dr. Nelsen regularly contributes to various blogs and magazine articles and was recognized as one of the "Planet's Top 100 Bloggers on Marriage Counseling" in 2017. They are currently writing a book to help people have deeper sexual awareness, intimacy and joy from an attachment-based perspective. They no longer provide psychotherapy and now offer attachment based trauma informed sexology sessions.

Dr. Ori is trained in Psychobiological Approach to Couples Therapy (PACT), Accelerated Experiential Dynamic Psychotherapy for Couples (AEDP), Sex Therapy, Somatic Experiencing (SE), Child Therapy, Art Therapy, Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), EMDR, is certified in Clinical Hypnotherapy and in sex therapy from California Institute of Integral Studies. While they do not offer psychotherapy, they utilize their deep understanding of attachment to inform their sexology practice.

Areas of particular passion to Dr. Ori are all things related to healthy attachment, sexuality, relationships, LGBTQ+ issues, ethical non-monogamy, gender identity, intimacy & sex, non-violent communication and joyful sex positivity.

They have a lot of experience with gender expansive, non-binary folks as well as LGBTQIA+ individuals, partners and couples. Dr. Nelsen’s training and experience as well as personal lived experience, qualifies them as a gender competent practitioner..

Some issues addressed in Dr. Ori Nelsen’s work with individuals and couples include sex and relationship issues, attachment, secure-functioning partnerships, effective communication, sexuality & intimacy, gender identity, LGBTQ+ issues, grief, parenting and pregnancy issues, and spirituality & mindfulness. As a Costa Rican born, Latinx LGBTQ+ identified non-binary femme, Dr. Nelsen is particularly drawn to work with people through a multi-layered a social impact lens. They have dual citizenship, are bilingual and have lived in and traveled to many countries. 

Their clinical interests are deeply rooted in attachment and relationship issues.  Dr. Ori welcomes and values cultural and sexual diversity.  They are Polyam / ENM and Kink friendly and uses the pronouns Them/Their/They/She/Her/Hers..

Sexologists and sex therapists can help with:

• Desire Discrepancies 

• Healing & Releasing shame

• Empowered Pleasure

• Rapid ejaculation

• Erectile dysfunction

• Delayed ejaculation

• Painful intercourse (e.g., vaginismus or vulvodynia)

• Lack of desire

• Mismatched libidos

• Learning to talk about sex, desire and pleasure

• Inability to orgasm

• Seeking recovery from sexual trauma

• Understanding or exploring sexual preferences that are not mainstream

• Normalizing and validating sexuality

• Attachment dynamics in sex and sexuality
  Increasing Sexual Intimacy

• Cultivating Sexual Intelligence

Dr. NelsEn’s ADDITIONAL TRAINING & EXPERIENCE (INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO):

• Anatomy & Neurology of Sensation & Pleasure, with Dr. Robert Morgan Lawrence and Dr. Carol Queen 2020

• Attachment-BAsed Sex Therapy 2020

• Life Coaching Certificate 2020

• A Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy® (PACT) 2013-2016, under PACT founder, Dr. Stan Tatkin, PsyD, MFT

• Certification in Sex Therapy through California Institute of Integral Studies 2017

• Mentoring by world renowned Sexologist, Sexuality Educator, Pioneer of sex coaching and former President of AASECT, Dr. Patti Britton. 2017

• Ongoing supervision in Sex Therapy under acclaimed author, clinical psychologist, past President of the Western Region of the Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality and esteemed Sex Therapist Dr. Stella Resnick, PhD 2017-

• Consultation with sexologist, Dr. Carol Queen and Dr. Robert Lawrence (As Needed)

• Clinical Hypnotherapy Certification (200 clinical hours),with Naomi O'Keefe, Ph.D. & Steve Johnson, Psy.D., San Francisco, CA 2010-2011

• Group and individual consultation with couples therapy expert, Dr. Michael Kline, Ph.D. utilizing Accelerated Experiential Dynamic Psychotherapy (AEDP,) Psychophysiological Approach to Couples Therapy (PACT), Internal Family Systems (IFS), Emotionally Focussed Therapy (EFT) training & consultation. 2012-2014

• AEDP for Couples, Core Training (2 years) with David Mars, Ph.D., MFT and Karen Pando-Mars, MFT, San Rafael, 2012-2014

• Practice in Transformative Action Leadership in Mindfulness Program, East Bay Meditation Center (2013-2014)

• Somatic Experiencing Practioner 2012

• Accelerated Experiential Dynamic Psychotherapy (AEDP) for Couples, level three

• Trainings on treating and assessing intimate partner violence (IPV) in LGBTQ survivors, via The Northwest Network for Bi Trans Gay and Lesbian Survivors of Abuse, Seattle, WA, 2013

• Training in Sex Therapy, under supervision of ASSECT certified clinical psychologist and sex therapist, Dr. Naomi O'Keefe. 2009-2010

• AEDP Essential Skills (1 year) with Diana Fosha, Ph.D. (Founder of AEDP), Karen Pando-Mars, MFT and others, San Francisco, CA 2013-14

• AEDP Immersion Course with Diana Fosha, San Francisco, CA June 2013

• EMDR training, 2017

• Treatment and Assessment of Substance Abuse & Addiction Training 2008-2009

• Outpatient community mental health services for adults over 21 years in age with moderate to severe mental illness, Led Dual Diagnosis (mental illness & substance abuse) group as well as worked with adult individuals dealing with addiction issues at Portia-Bell Hume Center 2009-2010

• AEDP Parts Work Training with Jerry Lamagna, San Rafael, CA 2012

• On-going AEDP Couples Consultation with David Mars, PhD., MFT (2012-2014)

• Various Control Mastery Trainings with the San Francisco Psychotherapy Research Group

• Eating Disorders and Body Image training (1 year) with Ondina Nandine Hatvany, MFT. 2008-2009

• Group Therapy training (1 year) under the supervision of Dr. Ireland, Ph.D. 2008-2009

• Advanced Skills training in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, with Dr. Lou Rappaport, Ph.D. 2008

• Sandtray and play therapy training for children 2008-2010

• Member of AEDP WEST, Marin, CA

• Member of AEDP

• Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) Couples Externship with Sue Johnson, San Francisco, CA 2014

• 500 hours internship at the Art of Yoga Project, working directly with founder, nurse practitioner and yoga instructor, Mary Lynn Fitton, in co-facilitating groups with high-risk incarcerated teenaged girls, utilizing processing, art therapy, creative writing and yoga as a means to bring personal and interpersonal awareness to the participants 2005-2007

  • The Art of Yoga Project focuses on early intervention to help marginalized and justice-involved girls prepare for a positive future. They are leaders in the treatment and rehabilitation of justice-involved girls by offering gender-responsive, trauma-informed, culturally-responsive, and strengths-based programming. Their mission is to lead at-risk, exploited and incarcerated girls toward accountability to self, others, and community by providing practical tools to effect behavioral change. We send specially trained yoga teachers, art therapists, creative arts and writing educators into facilities to deliver our mindfulness-based curriculum

• Massage training 2003

• Master of Science degree in Oriental Medicine: a program in Traditional Chinese Medicine and Acupuncture at Traditional Chinese Medical College of Hawaii, 2004-2005

• Certified Birth Doula, Seattle Midwifery School (Now Bastyr University), 2003

• Yoga Teacher Training, 2002

• Reiki Master, Seattle Reiki, 2000

PROFESSIONAL AFFILIATIONS

• Member of The American Psychological Association’s Division 56, Division of Trauma Psychology, 2010- Present

• Member of The American Psychological Association’s Division 43: The Society for Couple and Family Psychology 2012- Present

• Member of The American Psychological Association’s Division 44, The Society for Psychological Study of Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgendered Issues, 2010- Present

• Member of The American Psychological Association’s Division 12: Society of Clinical Psychology

• Member of The American Psychological Association’s Division 35: Society for the Psychology of Women

• Member of The American Psychological Association’s Division 32, The Society for Humanistic Psychology, 2010- Present

• Member of The American Psychological Association’s Division 30, The Society for Psychological Hypnosis 2010- Present

• American Psychological Association (APA) Member 2007-present

• AEDP WEST 2012-present

• Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy

• Member of the San Francisco Psychotherapy Research Group 2010-Present

• California Psychological Association (CPA)

• Member of Gaylesta: The Psychotherapist Association for Gender and Sexual Diversity

• International Centre for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy (ICEEFT)

• Northern California Emotionally Focused Therapy (NCEEFT)

• Accelerated Experiential-Dynamic Psychotherapy (AEDP)

• WPATH (World Professional Association for Transgender Health)

• The American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists

• Esalen Institute

• The Gestalt Journal Press and The Gestalt Therapy Network

• Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality

Highly Skilled San Francisco & East Bay Couples & Sex Therapists